Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Killer Queen Or Queen Killers?

The Idols tackled the great rock band Queen for this week's Top 8 theme. While this would have made a fantastic week on RockStar, on American Idol it was doomed to be a train-wreck. And a few of the Idols did not disappoint.

The first person onboard the train-wreck was Ace Young, who was attempting to put a R&B spin on "We Will Rock You". First of all, the song is not exactly a vocal showcase. Second of all, Ace isn't exactly a "RAWK" kind of guy. He's as much RAWK as AJ McLean is. Which is not at all. Ace is boy-band material all the way. He's Mr. Sensitive crooner; he is not one you'd buy singing this particular song. And then to make matters worse, he went painfully out of tune in the middle of the song when he was moving to the other side of the stage. I think he forgot the words right there too.

Right behind Ace on the train-wreck was Kellie Pickler, who appeared onstage with the dramatic lighting that made her look very Garth Algar-esque while singing "Bohemian Rhapsody". Hearing this country bumpkin singing one of the greatest rock songs of all-time in a high-pitched voice and winking into the camera at the end made me want to either laugh, cry and hurl. And I thought seeing Carrie Underwood singing "Sweet Child O' Mine" was excruciating. In comparison to Kellie, Carrie was practically Lita Ford. But back to Kellie, she also bumbled the words, singing in the beginning "Put a gun against his head/Hold my trigger now he's dead." I can understand messing up the words to almost any other Queen song, but "Bohemian Rhapsody" is one of the most popular songs ever! I have to hand it to Kellie, though. I think that she knows that her idiotic comments are her saving grace, and she pulled them out after that ridiculous performance ("Huh? On paper?" and "Ah don't have an accent!"), which will again keep her out of the bottom 3. I swear, one of these days, America is going to grow tired of her act, right???

Taylor Hicks was not train-wreck material vocally by any means, but some of his moves were. His failure to kick over the mic stand not once but twice epitomized everything I can't stand about him. I know that his liveliness/spazziness on stage is a good amount of his appeal, but I find that to be incredibly annoying. He looks like a fool up there. It's very Jon Peter Lewis-esque, but worse because he doesn't have the excuse of youthful exuberance because Taylor is 42 years old!

Everyone else performed credibly, with Elliott Yamin and Paris Bennett turning in great vocals with "Someone To Love" and "The Show Must Go On", respectively. Katharine McPhee had a few pitchy notes, but overall, I thought her "Who Wants To Live Forever" was really good. Eye-linered Chris Daughtry did his usual thing with the obscure "Innuendo" and showed a good amount of range, but, again, the judges try to prop him up with inaccurate facts. The reason why Queen has never sung "Innuendo" live before is because Freddie Mercury died soon after it was recorded. Idiots. Bucky Covington did a good job with "Fat-Bottomed Girls", but I think he's going to hit the seal tomorrow anyway, along with Ace and possibly Katharine or Chris, if you believe in DialIdol.com.

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